Tag Archives: Vitamuffin

Full House

Well ladies, its hump day again 🙂

These summer weeks are just flying by eh? I can’t beleive its already mid-July!!

So this hump day, I am in much less of a slump than the last one 🙂 My cousin arrived from Iceland last night! He is one of my best friends, and I am so stoked to have him here for 2 weeks! We have lots of fun stuff planned, shopping, sight seeing, baseball games, clubbing 😉 I cannot remember the last time my house was this full! Between January and April it was just me and my dad, but then my mom came back from Iceland, then my brother, and now my cousin. Full House 🙂

While my cousin knows everything that is going on with me, and that I am on a food schedule etc, I’m not gonna make him eat at my house all the time while he is on vacation! This means we will be taking him to restaurants and having some unplanned eats, but I will try the best I can to just be flexible. I’m also a little embarrassed about having to eat so often in front of him (6 times a day), but thats something I just have to get over if he is going to be here for 2 weeks. In reality, its nothing to be embarrased about! I’m trying to get better, and food is my (delicious) medicine! I am sure he will understand 🙂

Im gonna try my best to keep posting, but I may not be able to some days just cause things wills probably be a little hectic. Also, Im not telling my cousin about the blog, so food photo taking will have to be stealthy haha. I will for sure keep checking all your blogs though, no doubt about that!

Alright, on to some eats, all of these are from Monday 🙂
Breakfast:
DSC01816 Maple Brown Sugar Oatmeal, with 1/2 english muffin, topped with 1 tbsp DCD and sliced banana. 

Please ignore the splenda pack, I caved a little. Had half of it on the english muffin, and then realisedits tastes kinda bad!

 
I beleive my days of splenda loving are over!  
Can I get an aaaaaamen!?

That breakie kept me quite full for a few hours, but low and behold, a snack was consumed around 12:
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Strawberry Cottage Cheese, All Bran Buds, and some mo’ Java.

Just as I was finishing my snack, my mom said she was heading off to yoga. I asked if I could tag along, and she was ddooowwwn. 

It was my first time doing a normal class in about 2 years (I usually have private sessions, with the same teacher) and it was really fun! The stuff they were doing was a little more intense than what I do, but I just did what I could, and when the poses got too hard, I just chilled in childs pose. 🙂 It was fun!

After yoga we headed home, where I made some much needed lunch:
DSC01822DSC01826 

 

 

 

 

 

Brown Rice wrap with 2 slices turkey, melty mozzarella, tomato, lettuce and mustard. Apple slices, baby carrots, kashi crackers and some mango orange juice on the side. This was delicious, as always.

However, I do think that my lunches need a little more variety. Its always a similar sandwich with the same sides, and frankly, I am getting a little bored. Maybe a falafel one day? or a PB+J? 🙂 we will see what I come up with..

After lunch I did a little blogging and commenting, followed by a walk around the neighbourhood with my mom, cause on such a beaaauty of a day, its a shame to be inside for all of it!

When I got home from the walk, it was snack time once again:
DSC01829 

Vanilla yogurt with a crumbled up fruit n fibre bar (love em high fructose corn syrups…for some reason in Canada its labelled as glucose-fructose..odd yes?) and a strawberry boost. 

 

This was delicious and not too filling, which was key cause momma was cookin’ up a storm in the kitchen, and this time I got a picture of the magical result.

This is probably one of my favourite dinners of all time:
DSC01836 

Salmon poached in lemon juice and white wine, steamed veggies, brown rice, laughing cow for added flava on the veg, and some apple slices for dessert. Washed down with some vanilla soy milk 🙂

This was sooo good. I used to make this all the time, but for some reason had stopped making it. And ever since my mom made this on Friday night, I have been talking about how delicious it was, so she felt a repeat was in order. I wasn’t gonna argue 🙂

After dinner we all just lounged around the house. I also got to talking to one of my best friends who is spending the year in London, England. She has had such an incredible time. She got herself a job doing lighting for play productions there, and has since been asked by bands to do lighting for their gigs, and by event promoters to do lighting for their club events. preeeettyy snazzzy. The girl is finally returning to Canada in August, and I could not be happier. Though Im sure she would much rather just stay in England (can you really blame her?) 

Somethin’ Sweet:

DSC01845 Deep chocolate vitamffin with a kids vanilla fudge sundae cup, and some chocolate milk 🙂

 This was not the best ice cream I have ever had, so instead of eating it separate, I kinda melted it into the muffin, and it turned into a kind of chocolate mush. All I can say is YUM! 

In other news, I saw my dietitian yesterday and had a weigh in. She said my food records looked good, and that I was still doing really well. Only issue being that my gains are still not quite as good as they should be. For example I only gained 0.5 pound this time. So we agreed that I should try my best to get in every single serving (some days I miss one to two), and always get the supplement in, and see where that takes me. I’m gonna try my best to do that,so that I can keep seeing good results! This makes it all the more important for me to just stick to the meal plan, regardless of what my cousin may think of all the food I’m eating [too be honest, in all likelihood, he probably won’t even think about it, its prob just my ED being like: BE EMBARRASED! Lame ED…lame lame lame.]

Also, over the past few days I have gotten some e-mails from girls reading the blog, which has been really nice 🙂 Thank you for your e-mails!!

I just wanted to say that if anyone has any questions, or just wants to talk, I love getting e-mails, so do no hesitate to contact me 🙂 Also thank you all for reading my ramblings, its so great to know that some of you find it helpful, and I am really loving the blogging community 🙂

So as I said, I will try my best to keep posting, but there may be a few days here and there when I am a little less active than usual.

Hope you all have a great hump day! 
xx

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Bad News…

Well it’s Hump Day!

And unfortunatley I’m in a little bit of a slump (hah, witty)
Last night my parents went out to dinner together, and when they got back I could tell something was wrong. My dad didnt talk to me, or look me in the eye, and my mom was being SUPER nice. Too Nice.

About an hour later, I got to talking to my mom. And..it wasn’t good. It turned out that over dinner my dad told her that he had e-mailed my school, and my landlord (I was renting a house with 4 other girls next year) and told both that I would not be returning for school and asked for instructions on how to delay my courses/rent.  

At first I couldn’t speak. I literally had no words. This was something my dad had been kind of threatening if my weight didn’t go up more, soon. But it was something he was going to talk to me about first. And then he just did it anyway. I felt betrayed.

I have been working so hard, and going back to school has been my main motivation, and now it seems that has all gone away. 

I know my housemates are going to be annoyed because now they have to find someone else to take the room, and I know that everyone at school is going to know why I am not there. I know they are going to be talking about how I couldnt come back because I was still sick. And whats worse, and what is scaring me right now, is that while the first few months people will notice I’m not there, soon they will get used to not having me around, and maybe soon I won’t be missed. And even if I do get to go back next fall, I feel like it will all be so different. I will be a year behind everyone else, and everyone will know why I had to take a year off. I feel so ashamed. and gosh, girls, I just feel so sad. 

A part of me feels all my hard work has gone to waste. But the deepest part of me knows that is wrong. The progress I have made still counts. And I need to hold onto that right now, and not go the other direction, because really that won’t make things any better. I am going to keep gaining, and keep moving forward. The sooner my weight goes up, the sooner I can get back to LIFE!

Who knows, maybe I can go back in January, and only be half a term behind.

Its just so frustrating to me because I haven’t been weighed since I started this new meal plan last week. I may very well have gained, and my dad is just assuming the worst!!!

I’m seeing my therapist today, and maybe he will be able to help me sort through this. But yeah, I’m not feeling so fantastic right now. 

My best friends having a BBQ tonight, so I’m hoping that will lift my spirits a little. It will be nice to see friends, and get away from the parents and “reality” of it all for a bit.

“ahh yesterday…all my troubles seemed so far awayyyy..”

Breakfast:
Photo 62Egg McMuffin:
1 egg scrambled, 1 laughing cow wedge on an english muffin, panini’d to perfection.
1 banana sliced up, and some unpictured Java.

I was gonna have the blueberry yogurt, but was feeling kind of full, so decided to have some dairy lataaaa.

After Breakfast, my mom invited me on an outing to Ikea, and I happily obliged. Being Swedish, Ikea is the closest thing we have to our Scandinavian roots here in Canada, and so we pay them a patriotic visit from time to time 🙂 
One of my favourite things about Ikea, are their Swedish Meatballs,
 my oh myy, I used to always get the managers special portion (oh you know the one, with like 20 meatballs!?) which I would have done the yesterday had I not just eaten my lovely breakfast sandwich. We did however walk by the Ikea cafe, where I saw this somewhat shocking poster.
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A whole breakfast like that for ONE DOLLA!?

Is anyone else concerned with what the food is made of when they sell it for a single buck?

Crazy ikea corporation swedish folk.

 

After roaming around Ikea for a bit, we didn’t find much of anything, so we decided to just head home, but we did manage to pick up some daim mini bites (ahhhmazzzinngg chocolate, I can only ever find them  in Ikea) I was stoked.

Once we got home, I got to snackin’
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Creamy Vanilla Yogurt and a crumbeled up Fruit n Fibre Bar. Yum Yum Yum.

While eating, I did my blogging for the day, and some facebook chattin/creepin. 

Then me and my mom realised that the Micheal Jackson Memorial was on TV! 

We watched for a bit, pretty huge event eh? I thought it was pretty well done, and nice that his life could be celebrated like that. I do have to say though, that I find it hard to forget that he may or may not have violated some young kids…so I still feel kind of iffy about the guy. 😦

Some time later lunch was eaten, but i guess I was pretty hungry, cause I totally forgot to take a picture!! It was pretty standard though, turkey, laughing cow cheese, tomato and mustard on a whole wheat pita, with some apple slices, kashi crackers 1tbsp cream cheese aaaand some lovely mango orange juice. Yum. 
 
After lunch my brother got home from work and suggested we go for a bike ride (which I made sure was quick and light no worries 😉 )

We just biked around my neighbourhood and it was really nice to be out of the house in the nice weather, and doing a bit of exercise!! I definetley noticed that my muscles were a little weaker from not having exercised in soooooo long. But I understand that my body needs a rest, and I’m happy to give it them time it needs. I’m just looking forward to building up that strength again some day 🙂

After the bike ride I was feeling kind of  peckish (sp?) 

DSC01732

Banana and Butter on a slice of ezekial toast, which I paired with a tropical cottage cheese, and a Strawberry Boost.

Jenna left me a comment the other day saying that Strawberry was the best Boost flavour, so I made sure to pick some up, and my oh my was she ever right. It was delisshh!!

Sometime after this snack my parents got back from dinner, and thats when the day took a pretty sharp turn from fine to terrible. My mom, seeing I was upset took me out for a bit, which was nice. I definetley did not want to be in the house with my dad at that point.

A part of me does think that a year off would be good for me, to give me time to truly get completly better. But I wish it could have been MY decision, not my Dad’s. Its my life, and right now it doesn’t seem I have much say in it 😦

I needed some cheering up, so I treated myself to a dinner fit for a King Queen.

DSC01742

The lightings a little off, but this beauty was a Salmon Burger Pattie, brushed with maple teriyaki sauce (from the barefoot contessa, love that biddy) brown rice, spinach and steamed veggies accompanied by a laughing cow cheese wedge, apple slices, and some almond milk 🙂
This was super yummy, satisfying and filling. It was also a step in the right direction. 

Not going back to school is a bit of a set back, but Im not going to give up now on getting better. I am NEVER going to go back to restricting. 

Cause (and the wit continues) it has really only restricted my freedom in life!!

The Cherry on Top:

DSC01746 

Deep chocolate vitamuffin top, with vanilla pudding, chocolate milk, aaaannnnddd a couple daim bites. (yum!)

 

 
Well I am off to get myself ready for some BBQ action, I just got back from my therapist, and shiz was good, but I’ll leave that for another post, cause this one is LLOOONNNGGG.

Love you all! Stay Strong!! I know I’m gonna try!
xx

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“You can always go, Downtown…”

Gooood Morning, I hope you all had a great start to the week.

Mine was pretty good. As nice as it was to be with my friends this weekend, it felt good to get back to routine a bit, and just enjoy a day to myself 🙂

Breakfast was deeeelish:
DSC01720 Cinnamon Raisin Bagel
, buttered post picture, 1/2 green apple, strawberry cottage cheese (more than pictured, I just put some on the plate for you ladies to seee) and some 1% milk

This was my first time having these cinnamon raisin bagels, and my oh my were they good. For everyone in Canada, these are the Presidents Choice Bleu Menu Cinnamon Raisin Bagels. I highly reccomend them, delicious, and good for you!!

After breakfast I uploaded my pictures and videos from the cottage, blogged,  and then caught up with all of your lovely blogs, and it seems everyone had a great holiday weekend 🙂

After all that time in front of the computer, I needed to get myself out of the house. So got myself prettied up, and walked downtown (only about 10 minutes from my house, our area is great in that way as it is really quiet and feels closed off from the bustle of the city, yet in reality, its just a few blocks away 😉 ) The weather was amazing once again, so I walked slow and just took it all in.

photo-2 Once downtown I grabbed myself a double tall soy latte (are we sensing a pattern here?) and nibbled on this bar that I grabbed before leaving the house.

Kellogs Fruit n Fibre Bar. They don’t sell these in Canada, but I bought a big box of them when I was in Iceland. I know they are not the healthiest for you, methinks there may be some high fructose corn syrup in there. But I really like em’. So whatevvvaaaa.

Of course I also ended up in Whole Foods, where I restocked on some things: deep chocolate vita tops, some clif bars, a mint jocolat bar, yogurt, and some Amy’s instant meals (personal cheese pizza, spinach and feta pocket) I’m looking forward to trying out 🙂 

Are there any Amy’s products you guys reccomend?
I have had the burrito, and I loved that, but I definetley wanna expand on that. There are many a time when an instant meal would come in handy. 🙂 

Then I headed back home with all the yummy loot. Once I got home, and sorted all the stuffs away, I made myself some lunch:
Photo 572 slices Ezekial Bread, with 1 large turkey slice, 1 slice melty plastic cheddar, and some mustard. And as always, 1/2 green apple, 9 kashi TLC crackers, and some lemonade. We were out of carrots, I cried a little.

I didn’t realise until I uploaded the picture, but my outfit yesterday def had a halloweeny feel eh?

Twas a very yummy lunch, it had been a while since I had proper sandwhich bread, and my oh my had I missed it. After lunch my mom said she had to do some grocery shopping downtown, and asked me if I wanted to go along

grocery shopping? downtown (again!?) Obvi I went.

It felt really good to be out of the house so much today, and also spend some more time with the moms. We unfortunately got in a bit of a fight on the way home (shes basically just frustrated with my whole situation (slow weight gain etc), and sometimes that comes out in somewhat unreasonable arguments) While at first I decided to just storm off and walk ahead of her home, about 3 minutes in, I realised I wasn’t achieving anything, and it would just make things worse later. So I sucked it up, went back to her and said I didn’t want to be in a fight with her. I was still mad, but after about 10 minutes the anger passed, and she apoligized for blowing up as well. Crisis averted 🙂

Once we got home I decided to give my bestie a ring. Girlie had just gotten out of work completley exhausted and was headed to the gym to get her sweat on. (Thats one of the things I use to motivate myself, the sooner I get my weight up, the sooner I can begin to be active again and build a healthy relationship with exercise.) For the most part it was just a normal catch up sesh, but then she kind of surprised me by saying “what was wrong at the cottage?” I was definetley surprised by this, because as I told all you girls I had a great time. But I guess she noticed a few of the times I had mini panics about the unplanned food and such, cause she said there were times when she would see me and knew I was not all there, that a lot of me was preoccupied with what was in my head, (people know us much better than we think.) I explained to her the worries I had been having some of the time, but assured her I did have a great time. She was happy to hear that, but kind of upset that I had not talked to her about it, and reminded me to keep being open with her. At the time, I didn’t want to talk to her about it cause i didn’t want to ruin her good time at the cottage, but she said the only thing that really hindered the weekend for her was that she felt I was holding back from her, and that all she really wanted was for me to tell her at the time and let me know what was going on, so she could help me! 

I honestly feel so blessed to have friends that truly care about me, and are really there for me no matter what. I just need to remember to reciprocate. Be as open with them as they are with me, and be more present in their lives, and NOT pull away.  

Feeling resolved I headed down to the kitchen and whipped up a snack:
Photo 59

1/2 english muffin with 1 tbsp white chocolate wonderful (yum) 1 banana, and a chocolate boost. 

After this snack I decided my hair was lookin a little nasty, and felt I should shower. Enjoying feelin so fresh and so clean clean, I chilled around the house doing pretty much nothin’ until the hunger started to roll around, and I decided to start making some dinner. 

After reading this fabulous blog, I was craving myself a chicken wrap for dinner. So away I went on preparing some chicken for my wrap. However, being the forgetfull girl I am, I left my chicken in the oven tooo long, and the beauty burned. 😦

It was getting too late to wait another half an hour for another chicken breast, so instead I microwaved myself a veggie burger and enjoyed the resulting meal: 

Photo 61 Sol veggie burger with some more melty cheddar cheese, tomato slices, onion, mustard and ketchup on a whole wheat hamburger thin. Obvi it went on the panini grill too. Still lacking in carrots, I had MORE apple slices, some blueberry yogurt, and my fruit punch gatorade on the side. 

After dinner, I watched Kramer vs. Kramer with the parents. Its a great movie from the late 70’s starring a super young Dustin Hoffman and Meryl Streep. The movie basically focuses on a custody hearing between Hoffman and Streep over who should have sole custody of their kid (cutest kid ever by the way) after Streeps character leaves the family with no explanation for 8 months, only to return saying she wants the kid she had left! Craaaaazyy.

All in all it was a pretty good start to the week. Theres not too much planned for this week, which I am actually kind of looking forward too. Just taking it easy and seeing where the week takes me.

A BIG thank you for your supportive comments. Its really nice to know that my blog is being read, and hearing from you girls that I am doing well, is even more affirming, and motivates me to keep getting better! 🙂

Now you know I had to end the day on a sweet note:
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A deep chocolate vita muffintop (microwaved to maximize yumminess), with smores pudding and some chocolate milk. 

A yummy end to the day.

Alright I am off to watch the MJ memorial on TV. Should be pretty epic.

Have a great day girlies!!
xx

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